My upside down

My world seems distant. The walls don’t cave in. Nor do they shrink. They spread out. They become vast yet still feel caged. I am stuck. I hear the mumbles of people I don’t recognise their voices. I do not see there faces. I cannot call for help. My mouth is paralysed. My words are trapped. My limbs are not mine. My muscles are not under my control. Like a face in the darkness I peer through a window in time, I do not recognise the person I see through the condensated steamed up glass. Her body distorted her limbs hands hooked into shapes that I can only imagine hurt. Her eyes look glazed. Her body shakes. They call her name. It’s mine. It belongs to me. But that’s not me I am not that person on the floor. That cannot be me? I bang on the window I scream. I am here I am here I’m trapped in my own upside down they do not see me they do not know I am there. I’m a shadow. Blackened by my curse it’s fingers won’t let me go. I wake I don’t know where I am. My window has gone. Where have I been. Who are you? Do you know me?…. I bet you don’t….20171217_120554

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2 thoughts on “My upside down

  1. Oh Shell , it breaks my heart to read this . I pray for recovery for you, and until you recover ( and you will ) be as strong as you have been and as brave . Everyone loves you sweetheart xxxx

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